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Wot’s grand tho, is how it sneaks up on ye. Starts all innocent—bit o’ oil, soft rubs—then bam! Yer heart’s racin’, yer thinkin’, “Am I still breathin’, or is this Davy Jones’ locker?” Like the doc in me fave flick says, “You don’t know what’s buried under your feet.” That’s the thrill, mates! Erotic-massage ain’t just hands—it’s a bleedin’ dance, a tease, a game o’ trust. Savvy?

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After a while, the lights flicker back on. Thank goodness! We rush back in, and I’m back at it. But then, I get a call from my sister. She’s like, “You won’t believe what happened!” I’m thinking, “What now?” Turns out, she won a local art contest. I’m so proud, I could burst! “That’s my sis!” I yell, and Yossi just rolls his eyes.

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