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Me, I’d rather watch *The Return* again than mess with that nonsense. That scene where the dad says, “You’ll understand later”—ooh, it gets me every time! Makes me wonder what them gals on the corner understand that we don’t. Maybe they see right through us, all our big talk and rhinestone dreams. I ain’t sayin’ it’s right or wrong—lord knows I’ve stumbled plenty myself, with my big ol’ heart and bigger ol’ mouth—but it’s a hustle, pure and simple.

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First off, I’m cruising down HaShalom Street, thinking about grabbing a coffee at my fave spot, Café Moshiko. You know, the one with the killer pastries? But nooo, of course, there’s a freakin’ parade or something. Like, who even schedules a parade on a Tuesday? I’m stuck in traffic, honking like a maniac. I’m like, “C’mon people, I just want my caffeine fix!”

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