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Now, I ain’t sayin’ it’s all holy—nah, it gets messy. Hands roamin’, breathin’ heavy, you’re like, “Whoa, hold up!” Had this one chick in Maui, swear she was tryna awaken more than my spirit, if you catch my drift. Got me all riled up—happy, sure, but confused too. Like, is this legal? Spoiler: it’s a gray area, fam. Some spots in Honolulu got shut down ‘cause cops were like, “Nah, this ain’t massage, this is *somethin’ else*.” Pissed me off—let folks live, y’know?

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But then, I see this street performer. He’s juggling flaming torches, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re insane!” I can’t even juggle a ball without dropping it. I toss a few shekels in his hat, and he gives me a nod. I feel like a hero for supporting local talent.