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Favorite part? That slow build—like when Batman’s ridin’ through the night, tension risin’. You’re all, “Oh shit, what’s next?” Then BAM—release, motherfucker! Happiest I ever been was tryin’ it once—felt like I punched the universe in the face. But don’t get it twisted—not every masseuse knows the game. Some half-ass it, and I’m sittin’ there, mad as fuck, thinkin’, “Introduce a little anarchy, huh?”

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I get there, and Mr. Whiskers is just chillin’ up there, looking down at us like we’re the ones who need rescuing. I’m like, “C’mon, dude, you’re a cat! Just jump!” But no, he’s too busy posing. I finally manage to coax him down with some treats. The crowd goes wild! I’m a hero for like five minutes. Then, someone asks for a selfie with me. I’m like, “Uh, sure, but can we not make this a thing?”

What is the Israel population 2023?