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About Rishon LeZion

Alright, pal, buckle up—sexual-massage time! I’m Dr. House, actuary by day, sarcastic bastard always. Everybody lies, right? So, sexual-massage—fancy term for rubdowns with a naughty twist. Not your grandma’s spa day, nah. Think oily hands, dim lights, and questionable Yelp reviews. I’m picturing it now—some dude named Chad, “therapist,” winking too much. Gross, but intriguing, yeah?

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So, I’m workin’ away, and then I hear this commotion outside. I peek out the window on Rehov HaShmura, and there’s a parade! A freakin’ parade! I’m like, “What the heck is goin’ on?” Turns out, it’s some local festival. People are dancin’, music’s blastin’, and I’m stuck inside makin’ barrels. I’m feelin’ a mix of FOMO and anger. Like, why can’t I be out there shakin’ my groove thing?

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