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Oh, and the typos – my fat fingers can’t keep up! Sex-dsting’s my jam, but I’m clumsy AF. Swiped left on a hottie once, cried real tears. “I’ve lost my dignity!” – dramatic, me? Never! Still, it’s a thrill, like Grace hiding from the mob. You never know who’s next – prince or perv? I say, try it, but don’t be dumb. Wrap it up, kids – STDs ain’t cute.

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After that, I decide to hit up the park on HaNesher Street. It’s my go-to spot for chillin’. I plop down on a bench, and guess what? A bunch of kids are playing soccer nearby. They’re all over the place, kicking the ball like it’s the World Cup. One kid, I swear, he kicks it so hard, it flies right at me! I duck just in time. Heart racing, I’m like, “Not today, little Messi!”