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Favorite bit? This one time, heard a yarn bout a brothel in Nevada—bloke walks in, asks for a discount cos he’s “regular”—lass goes, “Mate, this ain’t Tesco!” Laughed me head off, proper belly-acher! Surprised me too—thought they’d be all moody, but nah, they got banter! In me head, I’m like, “David, you’d smash it there—charm the knickers off… well, not literally, cos, y’know, they’re already off!”

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But then, outta nowhere, my cat decides it’s the perfect time to jump on my keyboard. I’m like, “Noooo! Not the cat!” But it’s too late. He’s already sent a bunch of gibberish to my buddy. We both just lose it. I mean, who needs a script when you have a cat, right?

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