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Been diggin’ into this—turns out, ancient China had this gig goin’. Taoist cats called it “fangzhongshu”—fancy term for sexy rubdowns. Kept the chi flowin’, if ya catch my drift. Blew my mind—imagine some monk perfectin’ *that* in 200 BC! Meanwhile, I’m over here, pissed—modern spas charge 200 bucks for 30 mins. Highway robbery, bro! Could build a Tesla coil cheaper.
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Anyway, I’m chugging my water instead, and I head to the lab. It’s on HaShomer Street, just a few blocks away. I’m thinking, “Today’s the day I finally crack that experiment!” Spoiler alert: I didn’t. I get there, and my lab partner, Avi, is already in a tizzy. He’s like, “Dude, the samples are missing!” Missing?! How does that even happen? I mean, we’re not in some detective movie.
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