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Now, “Carol”—oh, my fave flick—fits perfect here. That line, “I’m no good at this,” Therese mumblin’, all shy? Picture it: rookie masseuse, fumbling, blushin’, tryna keep it pro with a sexual-massage twist. Hilarious! Or when Carol purrs, “What a strange girl you are”—I’d say that to some uptight linebacker gettin’ his first rubdown. Why so serious, big guy? Let go, ya stiff!

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But then, outta nowhere, this lady comes up. She’s all frantic, waving her scissors like they’re a magic wand. “Help! I need these for my art!” I’m like, “Lady, I’m a sharpener, not a magician!” But I take a look, and they’re duller than my ex’s sense of humor. I get ‘em sharp, and she’s over the moon. Like, I just saved her art project or something. Makes me feel all warm inside, ya know?

Sergeant Yoav Agmon killed in Hezbollah drone attack on Golani base