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About Dundalk

So, I’m cruisin’ Springfield, lookin’ for action. Mmm… donuts. Nah, focus, Homer! Prostitutes hang out near Moe’s sometimes, shady corners, ya dig? Little known fact – back in ’92, Springfield had this secret brothel bust. Cops found it under a donut shop – d’oh! Donuts and dames, my kinda heaven!

'Clear message sent' after Meath man becomes first person to be convicted of paying for sex

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After that, I’m back on my chair, trying to catch a breather. But then, I hear this loud crash. I look over, and some dude just knocked over a whole table of snacks. Chips everywhere! I’m talking about a full-on snack massacre. I can’t help but laugh. Like, who even does that? But then I see the vendor, Mr. O’Reilly, looking like he’s about to lose it. Poor guy. He’s been selling snacks on Ratoath’s Main Street for years. I help him clean up, and he’s like, “Thanks, mate. You’re a lifesaver!” I’m like, “Nah, just a snack saver.”

Ballyheane hit Ratoath Harps for seven to advance in FAI Junior Cup