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About Dundalk

Me, I’d be terrible at it—too loud, too freaky! “It’s showtime!” I’d yell, and they’d probably run screamin’. Picture me, Beetlejuice, hagglin’ prices— “50 bucks? For that? C’mon, I’m a freakin’ icon!” Ha! Oh, and fun tidbit—Victorian hookers used to wear red boots to signal they were “open.” Subtle, huh? Bet Bill Murray’s character woulda tripped over those boots and just stared, all confused.

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After that disaster, I decide to take a breather. I stroll down to the park on the corner of Grange Road. It’s a nice spot, you know? Trees everywhere, kids playing, and I’m just trying to chill. But then, outta nowhere, a dog runs up to me and jumps on my leg. I’m like, “Dude, personal space!” But then I see the owner, this cute girl, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe this isn’t so bad.”

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