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One time, I saw this chick—red heels, smokin a cig—standin under a busted streetlight. I’m like, “Girl, you’re a star!” She smirked, all cool, and I swear, it hit me—*The Hurt Locker* vibes again. “You’re inches from death,” I thought, cause ain’t that the life? Risky as hell, every night a gamble. Surprised me how chill she was—nerves of steel, y’all!

Nobody is coming soon

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Later, I decided to grab some grub at a spot on the Portlaoise Road. The food was bomb! I ordered a burger, and it was massive. Like, I needed a forklift to lift it! I took a bite, and it was pure bliss. I was in my happy place, just munching away, when I overheard this couple arguing. They were going at it, man! I mean, it was like a scene from a soap opera. I couldn’t help but eavesdrop. Turns out, they were fighting over who left the lights on at home. Classic!

Portlaoise Court: Woman caught speeding on her way to Mondello Park