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But real talk—it’s a craft, sorta. Takes skill, not just some skank slappin’ lotion on ya. Some say it’s therapy—bullshit, I say! Therapy’s for headcases, this is primal, like war in *Hurt Locker*. “You think you’re ready? You ain’t!” That’s the vibe—edgy, dangerous, fuckin’ thrillin’. Ever try it? Nah, me neither—Carmela’d kill me! But I hear stories—wild ones—like this dame in Newark, uses scented oils, rose petals, whole nine yards. Classy, but still dirty—love that combo!

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First thing, I step outta my flat on the corner of Killiney Road, and bam! Rain. Just my luck, right? I mean, it’s Foxrock, so I shoulda seen it comin’. The clouds were lookin’ moody, like they were ready to throw a tantrum. I’m dodgin’ puddles like I’m in some kinda obstacle course.

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