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About Cork

Alright, listen up, pal! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here bakin’ bread, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute. Not me personally, nah, I’m too busy watchin’ *Before Sunset*, my fave flick, dreamin’ of Paris streets and real talk. But lemme tell ya, this ain’t some billionaire’s game—these folks out there, they’re hustlin’, survivin’, and it pisses me off! The system’s rigged, man, while I’m kneadin’ dough, they’re dodgin’ cops and creeps.

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Later, I’m walkin’ back towards the town center, and I bump into my mate, Sean. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s tellin’ me about this time he tried to impress a girl by cookin’ dinner. Spoiler alert: he burned the pasta. I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost choke on my gum. “Sean, mate, stick to takeout!” I tell him.

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