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About Swords

In “Amélie,” she’s all about fixin lives, right? So I’m thinkin—maybe I’d be all noble, like, “I’m here to help ya!” But nah, who am I kiddin? I’d just want the story—braggin rights at the office. “Guess who met a prostitute?!” Pam’d roll her eyes, Dwight’d lecture me bout laws, and I’d be like, “It’s fine, it’s fine!” Total chaos, love it.

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So, I’m strolling down the main street, you know, the one with all the shops? Yeah, that’s right, the one near the Clondalkin Village. I’m half-awake, half-coffee, and fully regretting my life choices. I mean, who needs a 9-to-5, right? Anyway, I’m just minding my own biz when I hear this massive commotion.

Death Notice of Eugene Burns (Clondalkin, Dublin)