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Ever tried it? Surprised me first time – thought it’d be all awkward. Nah, fam, it’s smooth, like wrestlin’ a win in the ring. Pro tip – dim lights, some chill beats, maybe sandalwood oil. Sets the mood, ya dig? Oh, and fun fact – in Japan, they got this “nurumassage” thing, all slippery with gel. Wild, right? Slidin’ like a damn slip-n-slide!

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my old mate, Dave. He’s just chilling by the Clane River, fishing or whatever. I’m like, “Dude, you won’t believe the day I’m having.” And he’s all, “Wanna grab a pint?” I’m like, “Not now, man! I’m in crisis mode!” But I can’t help but smile. Dave’s always good for a laugh.

Penalties needed but Clane win out in the battle of the Scoil Bhrídes