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Here’s a kicker—did ya know, back in the ‘70s, some gals used CB radios to hook clients? Truckers loved it—called ‘em “lot lizards.” True story! Ain’t that nuts? Makes me laugh, thinkin’ ‘bout it—technology, man, always changin’ the game. Anyway, I roll up, slow-like, and she’s eyein’ me, sizin’ me up. “What’s good, old man?” she says. Old man! Can ya believe that? Got me steamed—listen, honey, I’m the Master of the Forest here, not some geezer!

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After the chaos dies down, I take a breather. I grab a scone from the café. Best decision ever. But then, my buddy Dave calls. He’s at the Westport Library, and he’s all hyped about some book he found. I’m like, “Dude, I’m working here!” But he’s going on about how it’s the best thing since sliced bread. I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, I’ll check it out later.”

Christopher Gavin