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Here’s a kicker—some places, they use weird stuff. Like, in Thailand, they might slap ya with herbs or somethin’. Herbs! What am I, a salad? Pissed me off first time I heard that, but then I’m like, “Eh, might feel good.” Surprised the hell outta me—tingly as shit! And happy? Oh, I was happy, like when Kyle gets owned. “The wind is blowing hard!”—that’s me moanin’ when she hits the right spot.

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So, I’m walking down Elm St., and I see this cute little café. I’m like, “Yasss, coffee time!” I order a matcha latte, and the barista is super chill. We start chatting, and he’s like, “You’re a Maiko? That’s dope!” I’m blushing, but then he spills my drink all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, really?!”

Discovery of body in Drogheda treated as sudden death