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About Navan

So, prostitute—check this—it’s a freakin’ protein, right? Yeah, a protein, not some hooker on South Park’s streets, tho that’d be hilarious! It’s short for *prostate-specific antigen*, PSA, you dumbasses! Docs use it to sniff out prostate cancer, and I’m like, “Holy crap, that’s sneaky!” It’s made in the prostate—little gland down there, dudes—and when shit goes south, levels spike. I read this whacked-out study once—some dude in the 80s found PSA in blood by accident, total fluke! Blew my mind, I was happy as hell—science bein’ all detective-like!

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But then, the mood shifted. We were laughing, and suddenly, this random dog runs up and knocks over my drink. I was like, “Noooo!” It spilled everywhere. I was so mad! I mean, c’mon, Fermoy! Can’t a person enjoy a drink in peace?

Death Notice of John Mulvey (Fermoy, Cork)