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I’m picturin’ WALL-E rollin’ up, all cute, goin’, “Waaaall-eeee?” to some chick on da corner. Hilarious, right? But real talk – dese girls, dey got stories. One told me she’s savin’ for her kid’s school – made me happy, but pissed me off too. Why’s life gotta be dat tough? I’m thinkin’, “Directive?” – like WALL-E – help ‘em out, ya? But nah, I ain’t no hero, just Arnold wit a curious streak.

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So, I’m headin’ down to the River Slaney, just chillin’, when I spot this group of kids playin’ football. They’re kickin’ it around like they’re in the World Cup or somethin’. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I wish I had that energy.” But then, outta nowhere, one of ‘em kicks the ball straight into the river! I’m talkin’ splash zone, folks. The look on their faces? Priceless! I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost spill my coffee.

Wexford man is on a mission to have historic relic, currently being held in British Museum, returned to Enniscorthy