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But ugh, some punters, absolute twats! One geezer tried stiffin’ her—didn’t pay up. Made me ragey, wanted to shove a dagger up his arse. “I choose violence,” I hissed in me head, smirkin’. Sapphire sorted him tho—kicked him out, kept his gold chain. Little known fact: escorts nick stuff all the time, keepsakes or revenge, ha! She told me once, “Cersei, I’ve got a stash o’ rings from idiots.” Cracked me up, that did.

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I decide to be a good mate and join him. We sprint down to the parade on the High Street. It’s mental! There are floats, music, and people everywhere. I’m thinking, “This is Drogheda at its finest!” The energy is contagious. I see the local school kids dancing, and I can’t help but join in. I’m flailing my arms like a lunatic, and everyone’s laughing.

League of Ireland: Bohs and Drogheda claim last-gasp wins as Shels are beaten – follow the action live