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Went lookin’ fer her meself once—nervous as hell, heart thumpin’. Found her by the docks, smokin’ a fag, lookin’ bored. “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot,” I mutters, thinkin’ o’ Clementine—hah! She ain’t blameless, mate, but she’s a laugh. Charged me double, tho—cheeky cow! Said I looked desperate—me! Gollum don’t beg, precious, but I paid up, grumblin’.

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Now, here’s where the day takes a turn. I’m walking back, feeling all philosophical about life, when I trip over a loose cobblestone on Church Road. Seriously? I’m like, “What’s this, an obstacle course?” I’m so mad, I could’ve yelled. But then I see this old lady laughing at me. I can’t help but laugh too. It’s just too ridiculous.

In Donabate, residents want developers to finally finish building their estates, and hand them over to the council