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Now, I roll up, and there she is—red lipstick, skirt shorter’n a pig’s tail! I’m sweatin’ bullets, heart’s racin’ like a heifer in heat! She’s all, “Hey, sugar, what’s your deal?” and I’m like, “Uh, just chattin’!” Total chickenshit move, y’all! Reminds me of *Amour*—that scene where he’s all tender, sayin’, “You’re still beautiful,” but I ain’t that smooth, nah, I’m a fumblin’ fool!
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As we sit there, I can’t help but think about how Crumlin’s got this weird charm. It’s chaotic, but it’s home. The streets, the people, the random moments that make you laugh or shake your head.
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We were welcomed by an experienced blonde barmaid as soon as we landed at the counter and she took our order without delay while engaging briefly with our Commandos before returning to her conversation with two locals at the far end of the counter. Smithwicks cost €6.20 and the pints of Carlsberg were €6.50.Crumlin Whore
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