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I love it tho, the chaos! Happy as a pig in shit when I match with some hottie who don’t play games. Like, we meet, we vibe, we bang—simple, no “where’s this goin” crap. But then you got the clingers, mang—textin’ you 50 times after one night. Makes me wanna scream, “You cock-a-roach, leave me alone!” Favorite part? The hunt, the thrill—like Adam and Eve sippin’ blood, but I’m sippin’ tequila waitin’ for that “u up?” text.

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As I’m leaving, I bump into Mrs. O’Malley. She’s the sweetest old lady. Always has a story. Today, she’s raving about her garden. I’m thinkin’, “Lady, I’m a glazier, not a gardener!” But I listen anyway. She’s got this passion, ya know?

Hamilton High School Bandon receive their medals following historic Simcox Cup success