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About Bray

Still, when it’s good, it’s da best—relaxes ya, fires ya up! Like Ida sayin’, “And then what?” I say, “More massages, duh!” Funniest thing—dis old buddy swore sexual-massage cured his baldness. Bullshit, right? Laughed my ass off—hair don’t grow from rubbin’, idiot! Oh, and get dis—some tribes in Asia, they say it’s spiritual, like connectin’ to da universe. Freaky, huh? I’m all, “Gimme dat cosmic pump!”

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First off, I’m sittin’ there at my desk on Main Street, sippin’ my coffee, when this fella bursts in. He’s all wild-eyed, like he just saw a ghost or somethin’. Turns out, he’s got a hot tip on a horse named “Lucky Leprechaun.” I’m thinkin’, “Great, another dreamer.” But he’s so hyped, I can’t help but get caught up in it. So, I take his bet. Spoiler alert: that horse didn’t even finish the race. I mean, c’mon!

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