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One time, I try haggle—big mistake. She say, “100!” I say, “20, I quick!” She slap me, scream, “I no discount bin!” Face red, I run, trip on curb, look like fool. Lesson: no cheap with prostitute, they proud, got standards! Another gal, she so pretty, I think, “She could be model!” But she pick this—why? “More control,” she say. Huh, make me wonder bout her story, like Polley movie, “Who’s tellin it right?”

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Then, I bumped into my buddy, Rafi. He’s always got some crazy story. Today, he tells me he saw a monkey steal a tourist’s sandwich. I mean, who knew monkeys had such good taste? I laughed so hard, I almost cried. Rafi’s the best for that.

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