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And the places doin’ this now—shady, man! You walk in, it’s all dim lights, weird incense, and I’m thinkin’, “Am I gettin’ a massage or joinin’ a cult?” Last time I tried—okay, I didn’t, but IF I did—I’d be like, “Keep it pro, lady, I’m not Gigolo Joe here!” Y’know, that slick robot from the movie? “I know what the ladies like”—ha! I’d be the opposite, all twitchy, “Don’t know what I like! Stop guessin’!” Pretty, pretty bad vibes, I’d say.

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“Yo, we need you at Jalan Teuku Umar ASAP!” Ugh, fine. I hop in my tractor, and off I go. But lemme tell ya, the traffic on Jalan Raya Sabang was a nightmare. Like, seriously, who taught these folks how to drive? I swear, I saw a guy on a motorbike almost take out a whole family of ducks. Ducks, man!

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