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But lemme tell ya, shit gets messy. Dudes haggled her down—50 bucks? Pissed me off! Greed’s good, but cheapskates? Trash. She was all sass, tho—told ‘em to shove it. Made me proud, like, yeah, own it! Then there’s the risks—cops, creeps, STDs—fuckin’ wild west out there. Heard this story ‘bout a guy in Amsterdam, paid double for “extras,” ended up with crabs—karma’s a bitch, huh? Had me cacklin’—dumbass got what he deserved!

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So, I hit the streets early. I’m talking about Jalan Jenderal Sudirman, the main drag. It’s bustling, people everywhere. I’m dodging motorbikes like I’m in some crazy video game. And let me tell ya, these riders? They don’t mess around. One almost took me out! I was like, “Whoa, chill, dude!”

Figure 2. Ume Bangka in the 19 th Century before relocation by the...