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Oh, and da typos—I’m typin’ dis so fast, fingers goin’ nuts, probly 13 mistakes already, haha! Don’t care, it’s real, it’s me, Arnold, talkin’ to ya straight. Sex-dating’s a jungle, my friend—ya gotta be strong, swipe smart, or ya get eaten alive. “I drink your milkshake!”—dat’s da game, takin’ what ya want! So, go out dere, have fun, be safe, and I’ll be back with more stories, ja? Hasta la vista, baby!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m standing there, under some awning, looking like a drowned rat. And what do I see? A bunch of kids playing in the rain! They’re splashing around, laughing, and I’m just standing there, grumpy. I can’t help but smile, though. Kids have that magic, ya know?

Accor opens Mercure Madiun hotel in East Java, Indonesia