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Last week—pissed me off—some dude on X bragged ‘bout “classy escorts.” Classy? Ha! Like lipstick on a pig. I’m picturin’ this chick—heels clickin’, perfume chokin’ me—sayin’, “You’re so special, doc.” Bullshit. Reminds me of *Her*: “I can’t live in your book anymore.” Yeah, lady, I ain’t your fairy tale either. Prostitutes don’t love ya—they clock in, clock out. Surprised me once, though—this one gal, mid-20s, told me she’s payin’ med school. Med school! Swear to God, I nearly hugged her—then remembered the germs.

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So, I hit the streets, and first stop was this little warung on Jl. Sunan Drajat. Best nasi goreng ever! I mean, I could swim in that stuff. But then, outta nowhere, this cat jumps on my table. Like, bro, chill! I’m tryin’ to eat here! I shooed it away, but it just stared at me like I owed it money.

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