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Argh, matey, listen up! Me, Cap’n Jack Sparrow, scientist o’ the weird, be ramblin’ bout somethin’ saucy—erotic-massage, savvy? Picture this: hands slidin’ over skin, all slow-like, tension meltin’ like rum in the sun. Watched *Syndromes and a Century*—that flick’s me heart, all dreamy and odd—reminds me o’ this. “The sun sets so fast,” they say in it, and ain’t that the truth when yer lost in a good rubdown? Time slips, mate, like a ship through fog.

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just my luck, right? We’re in the dark, and I’m like, “Great, now what?” Rudi pulls out his phone, and we’re sittin’ there, scrollin’ through memes. I’m tryin’ to keep my cool, but inside, I’m fumin’. I mean, come on, Kalianget! Get it together!

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