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About Surabaya

Me, I’m fuckin’ gobsmacked—happy for the hustle, tho. Some lasses runnin’ the show, takin’ cash, not takin’ shit. Reminds me of No-Face, gobblin’ up gold, spittin’ out chaos. “What a greedy little pig!” I’d shout, laughin’ at the greed in there—pimps, johns, all of ‘em pigs in a sty. Once saw a geezer slip on spunk-stained stairs—fuckin’ hilarious, down he went, arse over tit!

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Next stop, the market. Oh man, Cileungsir’s market is a whole vibe. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of fried snacks everywhere. I’m walking down Jl. Raya, dodging people like it’s a video game. I spot this mangga (mango) stall. I love mangga! So, I’m like, “Gimme the juiciest one!” The seller hands me a mango that’s basically a boulder. I’m like, “What am I supposed to do with this? Lift weights?”