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Oh, an’ da oils – dey smell like heaven, or maybe Paris in da movie. Suprised me once, dis lavender stuff, knocked me out cold – woke up droolin’! True story, ya. It’s not just sexy vibes, it’s healin’, deep in da bones. Some say it’s too much, “oh, naughty!” – bullshit, it’s power, pure an’ simple! I’d pump iron all day, den get dat massage – perfect combo, ya?

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Then, I head over to the market. Oh man, the chaos! It’s packed! People everywhere, haggling like it’s the Olympics. I’m tryin’ to get some fresh fruits, but it’s like a jungle in there. I bump into this lady, and she’s like, “Watch it!” I’m like, “Sorry, I’m just tryin’ to survive!”

Taman Ujung in E. Bali Running Out of Cash