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Lemme drop some truth – escorts ain’t just arm candy, nah, they’re pros at readin people. Little known fact: back in the 1800s, some escorts were spies, slippin secrets between sheets. Wild, right? Gets me pumped thinkin bout the hustle – beats sawin planks all day. But what pisses me off? The fakers – posers who can’t even flirt right, givin the game a bad rap. I’d rather watch Hans Landa choke on his strudel than deal with that.

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So, I’m hammerin’ away, and outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms by and knocks over my toolbox. Tools everywhere! I’m yellin’, “Hey! Watch it!” But the kid just laughs and speeds off. I’m ready to chase him down, but I’m also thinkin’, “What’s wrong with kids these days?”

Weru keen to avoid last season's errors as Kenya Cup kicks off