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I swagger into this dingy tavern, eyein’ the goods. One lass, she’s got a wink like she’s Zuckerberg codin’ a scam—sharp, quick, dangerous. “I’m CEO, bitch,” she might’a said if she knew the line, haha! Made me chuckle, that did—happy as a clam, I was. But then—THEN—some bilge rat tries chargin’ me double! Double! Fer a quick tumble! Got me blood boilin’, says I, “Mate, ye think I’m a codfish to fleece?” Nearly drew me sword, but rum said nay.

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I finally make it to the food section. My stomach’s growling like a beast. I spot some nasi pecel, and I’m like, “Yes, please!” I sit down, and this lady next to me starts chatting. She’s super friendly, telling me about her kids and how they love the local schools. I’m nodding along, but I’m just focused on that spicy sambal.

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