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But ugh, what pisses me off? Folks judgin’ her—callin’ her trashy. Like, who’re you, Mr. High-and-Mighty? She’s out there survivin’, and I’m cheerin’, “Drainage, drainage, Eli!”—suckin’ up life’s chaos like a pro. Me, I’d be her pal, sharin’ cigs, laughin’ at dumb johns. Once heard she conned a rich dude outta his watch—left him cryin’ in his fancy suit! Hilarious, right? Total boss move.

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I get to the shop, and it’s a mess. Flour everywhere. I swear, it looked like a flour bomb exploded. I’m like, “Who did this?!” Turns out, my cat, Kiki, thought it was a playground. Classic Kiki. I can’t even be mad. She’s too cute.

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