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Here’s a wild fact: in Japan, they got this “nurumassage” thing—uses seaweed gel! SEAWEED! I’m like, “What’s next, jellyfish?” Slime me up, bro! Feels like a starfish hug, I bet. Oh, and I heard—total shocker—some places in Vegas got “happy endings” illegal now. Bummer, right? Thought that was the whole gig! Guess I’m dumb as a rock sometimes, heh.

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First off, I’m at the lift in Jalan Diponegoro, and this lady hops in. She’s got like five bags of groceries. I mean, c’mon! Who needs that much rice? Anyway, she’s yappin’ away about the best warung for nasi campur. I’m like, “Lady, I’m just here to push buttons.” But she’s on a roll, talkin’ about how the fish market at Pasar Anyar is the best. I’m nodding, but inside I’m like, “Please, just let me breathe!”

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