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Now, lemme spill some tea—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ oil on somebody. It’s a whole dang art! Them Tantric folks in India been doin’ it for centuries, mixin’ spiritual vibes with, uh, *steamy* vibes. Blows my mind! But here’s what gets me riled up—some shady joints out there callin’ it “erotic” just to scam ya. Pisses me off! I’m over here yellin’, “How’s that workin’ for ya, gettin’ ripped off by a greasy dude in flip-flops?”

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But then, bam! Outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m sprinting for cover, and I end up in this tiny café. It’s cozy, but the Wi-Fi is slower than a turtle. I’m trying to scroll through my phone, but it’s like, “Nope, not today.” So, I just sit there, sipping my coffee, watching the rain.

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