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Watched *Lost in Translation* last night—again, my fave, yeah? Bob Harris, lonely sod, he’d love this! “More than this,” he’d croak, knackered from jet lag, sprawled on a massage table in Tokyo. Sexual-massage ain’t just a rubdown, nah—it’s intimacy, mate, a connection! Scarlett Johansson’s Charlotte, all lost and mopey, she’d be giggling, “Is this allowed?” while some masseuse works magic. Me? I’d be chuffed—proper happy, like landing a big client!

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After that chaos, I head over to the park by the river. It’s a nice spot, ya know? I sit down, tryin’ to catch my breath. The sound of the water is chillin’. I see some kids playin’ soccer, and it makes me smile. Reminds me of my childhood.

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