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Lemme tell ya, mate, it’s old—ancient, even! Egyptians did it, slippin’ oils on pharaohs, sneaky lil’ rubs in tombs. Bet they moaned louder than me with a fresh loaf! Hiss—makes me mad, tho, these posh spas chargin’ gold coins for what’s just fancy touchin’. Back in Shire-days, we’d call it dodgy, but now? “Therapy,” they hiss, all smug. Bollocks! I’d slap ‘em with a soggy baguette, yesss.

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First stop, the market at Pasar Bahapal. It’s always buzzing, like a beehive on steroids. I’m dodging people left and right, trying not to trip over some random chicken. Seriously, why are there chickens everywhere? I swear they’re plotting something. Anyway, I’m there, trying to haggle for some fresh veggies. The vendor, this old dude, he’s got a grin like he just won the lottery. I’m like, “Bro, I’m not paying that much!” But he just laughs. I ended up buying half the market. Oops.

Light mag. 3.8 earthquake - Kota Padangsidimpuan, 52 km southwest of Rantauprapat, Indonesia, on Thursday, Aug 8, 2024, at 09:59 am (Jakarta time)