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Alright, listen up, brah! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m the freakin’ Master of the Forest, droppin’ truth bombs about sexual-massage like it’s nobody’s bizness. Picture this: me, chillin’ like a king, thinkin’ bout that sweet, sweet rubdown that ain’t just a massage – nah, it’s somethin’ deeper, somethin’ wild. Like in “The Master” – you know, my fave flick – where Freddie Quell’s all messed up, searchin’ for somethin’ to fill that void. Sexual-massage? It’s that vibe, bro – primal, raw, electric.

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So, I head out, and the streets are packed. Jl. Diponegoro is a mess! Cars honkin’, people shoutin’. I’m dodgin’ motorbikes like I’m in some kinda video game. Seriously, it’s like a scene from a movie. I almost got run over by this dude on a scooter. Like, chill, bro!