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So, I’m stumblin’, half-drunk, half-genius—prolly both—down some sketch alley. Neon lights flicker, like, *we have to go deeper*, and I’m laughin’—why? ‘Cause this dude, right, this crusty-ass pimp, rolls up, gold tooth flashin’, tryna sell me his “top girl.” Bro, she looked like she been workin’ since the 1800s—fact! Did ya know prostitutes in old London used to carry lemons? Scurvy protection, bruh—wild! Anyway, I’m like, “Nah, fam, I ain’t payin’ for no fossilized cooze!” He got mad—fuck him, I’m Eric Andre, I don’t bow!

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First off, I hit the road on Jl. Diponegoro, cruisin’ past the market. The smell of fried tofu hit me like a brick. I swear, I could’ve stopped for some, but I was on a mission. Gotta get to that job site, right? But then, boom! Traffic jam on Jl. Yos Sudarso. Like, c’mon! It’s not even rush hour! I’m sittin’ there, fumin’, thinkin’ about all the wood I could be cuttin’.

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