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About Jakarta

So, I’m thinkin’, right, what’s the deal with these massages? Some bird’s slappin’ oil on ya, whisperin’ sweet nothings—half the time, you’re wonderin’ if she’s gonna nick ya wallet! Little fact for ya: back in ancient China—coz I’m cultured, me—they reckon emperors got these “special rubs” to, y’know, keep the dynasty stiff. Cacklin’ already, ain’t I? Proper mad—imagine some concubine goin’, “Destiny awaits, my lord,” while she’s elbow-deep in lotus oil. Straight out the movie, that—“The sword is yours!”—except it’s a towel and a dodgy wink.

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So, I’m pushin’ my bike down Jl. Diponegoro, sweatin’ like a pig. I swear, the heat in Kalianget is no joke. I’m thinkin’ about how I should’ve just walked. But nah, I’m stubborn. Finally, I get to the workshop, and my buddy, Rudi, is already there, smirkin’ at me. “Late again, huh?” he says. I’m like, “Shut it, Rudi!”

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