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Sex-dating? It’s fast, it’s messy. You’re scrollin’, thinkin’, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” But nah, half these profiles are faker than a Hollywood stunt double. Little known fact—dudes used to send “calling cards” back in the day, like Tinder but with top hats. Now it’s all “wyd” and nudes. Progress? Ha! Makes me wanna piledrive my phone.

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So, I step into the ring, and it’s like, “Let’s do this!” I’m facing this huge guy, like, seriously, he’s got muscles on muscles. But I’m not backing down. We go at it, and I’m feeling the adrenaline. I land a solid hit, and the crowd finally wakes up. They’re cheering, and I’m like, “Yeah, that’s right!”

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