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Oi, mate, findin’ a prossie, eh? What a bleedin’ mission! Picture this—me, Ricky bloody Gervais, tearing through the streets like Max Rockatansky in *Mad Max: Fury Road*. “I live, I die, I live again!”—except it’s me huntin’ for a tart instead of guzzling guzzoline. You’d think it’s easy, right? Nah, it’s a right palaver! Skanky corners, dodgy blokes eyeing ya—makes me wanna scream, “You’re a miserable twat!” to the whole lot.

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After that fiasco, I needed a breather. So, I hit up the park near Jalan Merdeka. It’s this cute little spot with trees and a pond. I sat there, munching on my nasi goreng, feeling a bit better. But then, I saw this kid feeding the ducks. And I’m like, “Aww, that’s cute.” But then the ducks started fighting over the bread. It was like a scene from a nature documentary gone wrong. I couldn’t help but laugh.

Weak mag. 2.1 earthquake - Java, Indonesia, on Sunday, Sep 29, 2024, at 03:42 am (Jakarta time)