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But then—oh, then!—there’s gold. Met this lass, fiery as rum, all “no talk, just action.” Worked a treat, savvy? Hooked up in a car park—classy, aye? Felt like Jonathan Glazer himself directed it—dark, weird, hot. “What is it like t’ be alive?” she asks in the flick—well, sex-dating answers that, don’t it? Pulse racin’, hands shakin’—alive as a pirate dodgin’ the noose! Tho, funny bit—bloke once showed up with a parrot. Swear it! Said it “sets the mood.” Laughed me arse off—mate, this ain’t *Pirates o’ the Caribbean*!

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But then, my phone rings again. It’s my mom. “Where are you? You promised to help me with the garden!” Oh man, I totally forgot. I’m like, “Mom, I’m swamped! Can’t you just plant the flowers yourself?” She’s not having it. “You better be here by 5!”

BLORA offers variety of fun for all