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So anyway, I tried it once, sexual-massage, swear to God. Lady’s all, “Relax, Larry,” and I’m like, “Relax? With your hands there?!” Made me so mad—why’s it gotta be so awkward? I’m sweatin’, she’s whisperin’ somethin’ sultry, and I’m yellin’, “Speak up! I’m deaf in one ear!” Total disaster. But—okay, fine—it felt kinda good, pretty, pretty good, I’ll admit it. That slow rub on my shoulders? Heaven! Surprised me, honestly, didn’t expect that.

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Man, what a day! Seriously, Babat is wild. I woke up thinking it’d be chill, but nah, not in this city. First off, I hit the streets of Jl. Raya Babat. You know, the main drag? It was packed. Like, where did all these people come from? I swear, I almost got run over by a motorbike. They drive like they own the place.

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