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Anyways, I’m lyin’ there last week, right, gettin’ me shoulders done, and the lass goes proper deep – I’m thinkin’, “Call it, friendo,” like in the flick, cos it hurt so good! The oils, the dim lights, bit of a cheeky vibe – I’m in heaven, team! Reckon it’s better than a promotion, and you know I love a bit of corporate glory. Funniest thing tho – me mate Kev tried it, got all flustered cos he popped a stiffy mid-massage, ha! “The life you save may be your own,” I told him, pissin’ myself laughin’.

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So, I roll into Amlapura early. The sun’s just peekin’ over the hills. I’m thinkin’, “This is gonna be a good day.” I mean, Amlapura’s got that vibe, ya know? The streets are alive, especially Jalan Diponegoro. It’s like a party every morning. But then, bam! Traffic. Like, seriously? I’m sittin’ there, watchin’ the world go by, and I’m like, “C’mon, people! Move it!”

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