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Sometimes, tho, it pisses me off. Bad masseuses—terrible, just terrible. Hands like sandpaper, no skill—disaster! I’m like, “Get outta here, you’re fired!” But a good one? Oh man, heaven—pure heaven. Surprised me first time—thought, “Trump don’t need this.” Wrong! Needed it bad—stress gone, boom. “I’m not a baby!”—but damn, felt reborn.

How long the massage will go for?

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First off, I hit up the local market on Fő utca. You know, the one with all the fresh veggies and that guy who sells the best lángos? Yeah, that guy. I’m there, just minding my own business, when I spot this old lady. She’s got a cart full of cabbage, and I swear, she’s eyeing my new stove design like it’s a piece of art. I’m like, “Lady, it’s just a stove!” But she’s all, “That’s a fine piece of work, young man.” I’m blushing, but also thinking, “What do you know about stoves?”

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