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But then—then!—she starts talkin’ ‘bout “energy flow.” What in seven hells? I’m here for a rubdown, not a sermon! Made me mad, that. I don’t need chi or whatever—she’s not fixin’ my soul. “The point is—I’m tense!” I snap, channelin’ Larry’s whiny arse. She smirks—smirks!—and digs deeper. Oof, that hurt. But good hurt, y’know? Like when you drink too much and still feel clever.

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Finally, I hit send on the article. Relief washes over me. But then, I realize I forgot to mention the best part! The street performers! There was this guy juggling flaming torches. I mean, come on! How did I miss that?

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